Setbacks

This week has been unkind. I have had a nightmare week for the nausea and dizzy spells. I have been really sick this week. This week I was getting out of bed, blacked out and fell onto the wall on my bell. I had spotting for a while. I had a regular doctor appointment on Monday so I just went straight there to get checked. They sent me to the high risk OB and had an ultrasound. Everything looks good. The baby was healthy and happy and looks like we will be adding boy number four to our family. We are excited and looking forward to a healthy baby.

Last night I was so sick all night long. Then half way through the night I passed out again, this time hitting hard on my ribs. I think I may have injured them. Oh well, par for the course right.

I had more sutures put into my PICC line at my appointment on Monday too. The last dressing change had pulled one side of the sutures loose so she had to put them in on both sides. More fun!

Today I spent most of the day laying flat just to try and keep the pain from attacking my sides. I am hoping that the last few days have just been a bad few days and that things will get better quickly. I have to have a round of fluids tonight so maybe that will get me back on my feet for tomorrow.

Much Better!

Yesterday the new home health agency started working with me at the house. The difference was huge and was a big relief. I cannot emphasize enough the importance of good care when you are dealing with HG in pregnancy. The compassion and proactive treatment of my physician has made such a difference in this pregnancy. Even though I still feel horrible most of the time, I have not reached the critical stage like I did in my last pregnancy. Have a doctor who is willing to take time to keep working with me and working through the issues associated with HG means that I am not in such a huge deterioration and have spent way less time in the hospital.

The new home health agency was wonderful. Where the first company was more concerned about what they would not do and what worked best for the, this agency wants to do what is best for the patient. They took extensive time filling out my history and checking my health. When they found out I had been having some issues, the picked up the phone right there and contacted my doctor. Where the last company would have said I should call, they picked up the phone and called her themselves. In addition to the time and care they took finding out my situation, the offered many helpful alternatives should I need the services. For instance, they have offered to do blood draws and take them to the lab rather than my having to make a special trip to the doctor to have them done. They listed several things they can do as long as they have doctor orders. They were more than willing to do things to make my life easier and were most concerned about what was going to be best for my health. Huge difference, they are definitely patient focused!

Currently I am having trouble sleeping at night, this is not uncommon with my pregnancies. First I am usually up sick most of the night and I am prone to insomnia with my thyroid issues. So I am really exhausted most of the time. I am trying to find ways to resolve the insomnia but if it continues I suppose I will have to talk with the doctor about the issue and see if there is some remedy. I seem to have good days and bad days, days where I am sicker than others and am able to keep less down. I try to balance those days by making sure that I eat good foods the days that I can keep more down. I am currently reading through lists of "pregnancy super foods." I will post a good list once I have them down. However, I do always tell people that you are the only one who can decide what you can and cannot eat. Knowing something is good for you will not over rule the gag reflex if you are not interested in eating that particular food.

I am no in my 17th week. Around 20 weeks is when I see a marked difference in the sickness. Usually around that point things start to taper off and I start to hold more down. I am hoping that this is going to be the same trend with this pregnancy. I HOPE!

Monday Stinks...

Today was one of those days you wish you could just stay in bed and never get up. The nausea was a nightmare and I ended up taking my Zofran with me where ever I went. Have I ever mentioned that I really, really, really dislike being nauseated.

Today has also been a nightmare for the up and down moods. I hate not being patient. My oldest son has started moving into that "I know it all Mom" phase and it drives me BANANAS! I have been able to diffuse it pretty quickly but today not so much. I lost my temper and really felt bad after. Later we had a long talk about being respectful and the best way to talk to your Mom, but it was still after losing my temper. Well there you have it world, I am human! Send it to the papers!

Later we went to dinner and it was another test of my ability to function without losing my temper. Why is it when you are struggling with this crazy up and down temper the people around you act ridiculous? There always seems to be some little comment where I want scream, luckily there was plenty to distract so I was able to avoid any ugliness.

I am looking forward to the next two days. I am creeping up on 12 weeks and then the next week starts the second trimester. I am hoping everyday that it will be much better than the first even though it hasn't been too horrible. Anyway, that is about the extend of my Monday.

Two more days till 12 weeks.

Happy 11 Weeks! Almost to the 2nd Trimester!

Today was a tough one, had a good bit of nausea and exhaustion today. I hate feeling this tired. I just went to the store and the bakery and by the time I got home I had to have a nap. This really stinks!

I am worrying that maybe the medicine is starting to lose effectiveness again. Maybe it is just being tired, I know that this can have a huge effect on how you feel and the amount of nausea you have with HG. I should probably get more rest and do a bit less, after this week I will be finished with my school work and will have TWO weeks to just relax, that should get me into the second trimester. Maybe the second will be better than the first.

Try really hard not to get tired out anymore and need to continue to remember to eat small snacks through the day. I know this helps and need to just keep plowing through with the plan. I want to take the boys to see some things while we are here so I am hoping that in the next two weeks we can get some of those things done.

Busy Few Days - 10 Weeks 5 Days

The last few days have been crazy with all the work at school coming to a close. Classes end in two weeks and I will find out if I can proceed to the final class for doing the research for my thesis and if I will graduate. Nerves are deeply affected by the thought that it all comes down to these last classes.

The nausea has been tough. I have had a few break through moments but nothing too overwhelming like the last time when it took me out of commission. I have found that I am becoming OCD about taking my Zofran. I count to the minute when the next dose is and MAKE SURE it is taken on time. Even if I have to stay up a little later to get a dose I make sure it gets taken. I feel panic sometimes thinking I might miss a dose. Seriously how crazy is this, but considering the nightmare of the nausea and vomiting I go through I suppose this on some level makes sense.

The last few days I have been having killer reflux. Taking Pepcid has helped, usually it flares up at night right before bed. I try to eat a little something that reduces acid and wait to go to bed till the burning wanes a bit. I keep saying this pregnancy is so backwards. Normally I have reflux, swelling in my legs, and aches in my hips and legs at the end of my pregnancy. This time it is all happening up front, maybe this means the end will be symptom free, would that be too much to ask?

On a lighter note, I braved Chuckie Cheese with all THREE of my boys. I know insane, and it was crazy. I usually do not do things like this without my hubby and especially pregnant, but my sister called and wanted to go. The older boys were fine, they did their thing, the little one was the nut. He was all over the place, and even just keeping my eyes on him I would lose him in the maze of games. Lesson learned, somethings require Daddy to tag along to make sure that I don't leave wishing for death lol, okay not that extreme. I came home and put my boys to bed and I took a nap. I slept like I was in a coma.

Well off to finish my class work for this term. Hoping that all things end well and I keep my 4.0 to the end and graduate with this GPA.

Two days away from the 12 week mark. Look out world we are closing in on baby number 4. :)

So Tired - 10 Weeks 1 Day

Today has been one of those pregnancy crazy days. I am really tired and had a bad nausea day, but overall it was better than it was last week. My Dad really wants me to stay here a bit longer and I am thinking if I do stay, I just don't know how much more energy I can throw out there these coming days. I am not making my decision till the end of the week though, I want to make sure that the last few days of feeling good have not been some fluke. Time will tell and probably tomorrow and the next day will be the best predictor of what will be in the next couple weeks.

Other than tired and a bit of bad nausea there was not a great deal of negative pregnancy stuff.

On another note I am considering doing some "Mommy Water Time" when I get back. The Life Style Center at my husband's work has classes for expecting mothers. I have heard that pool time can help with the pregnancy aches and pains as the pregnancy progresses and the thought of some time to exercise and be around other pregnant Mommies sounds like fun. In addition I do not want to be 1000 lbs by the time my baby is born so a little exercise certainly won't hurt. The only thing is that the exercise is at 5 a.m. so freaking early, my dude and I would have to be up and out of the house quickly so that we could get to the exercise classes. I don't know I have a couple more weeks before I have to commit but I would like to do it I think and I know that it would be beneficial to both me and baby to have some exercise other than walking in the heat since I basically live on the surface of the sun, or so it feels like with the extreme heat in our area.

A little better tonight - 10 weeks tomorrow!

Today was a it better. I took my time getting things together and making sure I was on top of my medicine and trying to eat little snacks that have higher protein. I heard that this can help so I tried that today. I am going to talk about foods so if that triggers skip this post.

I have been craving things like cheese, potatos, and ranch. :) Today I ate a few cheese cubes as a snack. I have heard that just a few cubes of cheese or something salty like chips can adjust your stomach and for today it helped. I also suggested for dinner to go to a place that only served one "type" of food. We went to eat at an Italian place and it was fine. The smell issue was minimal and seemd to be pretty in control. I even felt good enough to go and find some materinty clothes after dinner.

So maybe if I focus and try to keep on top of things that will keep my nausea in check. Here is hoping!

To take or not to take...9 weeks 5 days

Sitting here trying to decide whether or not to take the rest of my medicines tonight. I am so nauseated and I am having the WORST freaking stomach pains. The idea of forcing anything down my throat at this time is just not a happy thought. I also need to eat a little something so that one of my medicines the hormone does not make me sick (note the irony, don't want to eat, must eat to take pill that can make me sick). I am tired and want to go to bed it is almost 1 am here in the East and I really need to decide soon. Maybe a quick shower and then a snack and then the meds. I tried drinking a bit of water (that will come back to haunt in the middle of the night), but it hasn't made that blah feeling in the back of my throat disappear. Maybe a peppermint tea...I just do not KNOW tonight. Blah

Ready to Disconnect...

I rarely talk about this side of my personality because it just is not my favorite. Like I said in a previous post, I despise drama, and for some reason it seems to be following me lately. I have a tendency when this happens to just totally disconnect from everyone but the kids. Sometimes it just makes it easier to not deal with all the mess and let everyone get settled before venturing back in to the fray again. At this point that would be next to impossible considering I am visiting my parents and I can exactly turn off the phone or Internet etc...

Last night and today were a total nightmare. The nausea./vomiting is getting worse and I was totally out of my Zofran. My husband had overnighted it yesterday but I was out and so I was totally riding those waves one after another all day today. I just wanted to lay down and not think. Lights, the computer, noises, whatever, it all made me ill and so I was trying to just lay down and not think about the nausea. I curled up on the couch with a blanket and pillow and a cool cloth for my head and neck. My kids were back in the room watching their movies and things were pretty quiet until my Dad got back from his morning chores.

He walked in and the first words were..."Do you need to go to a doctor?" Of course my reply was no, there really isn't anything a doctor here can do. I really need to be at home with my doctors and be able to have my medication adjusted as needed. Then there was my mother, "you know if you eat some crackers, or if you eat more vegetables, or if you do xyz...you will feel better." I wish that those things worked, oh how I really really wish that these things would work, and yet they just do not work. Once I got to where I could sit up and make adequate decisions I called my husband and said that we should change the return day to the 29th of July rather than the 19th of August. Just saying it made me want to cry and yet I know it is the best thing to do for both me and the kids. I feel like if I wait much longer the drive will become pure hell and we will end up making more stops to accommodate the hyperemesis. Then there is the whole what if I get so dehydrated that I need intervention. Too many unknowns and variables that are outside my control.

Then this time there has been more drama. Normally I can let it fly right off my back and just ignore the whole situation. This time it has really worn me down. It seems like every time I turn around someone disagrees with something in my parenting. Sometimes it feels like no matter how old I am or how many degrees I have I will always be an idiot to certain people. Total frustration with that attitude. Then there is the whole issue where I get questioned about the extent of my sickness and why can't I just brush it off and go and do whatever it is other people want me to go and do. So then I blame myself for not being able to do the things that others want and feel like maybe this is my fault. Maybe it is all in my head or maybe I am just exaggerating. Maybe if I just go out and do all the things other pregnant people do I would feel better. Maybe it is just in my head, maybe the reality is that I am just sensitive to nausea and vomiting from my previous experiences and so I am over reacting. Maybe...

I will have to tell my parents that I am leaving earlier. I do not really want to tell them they are going to be so disappointed. I am disappointed, the kids are going to be so sad. Once again I am the ruiner of plans and fun.

Just one of those really down days.

The honeymoon is over... 9 wks 1 day

Sadly, the wonderful honeymoon stage of the pregnancy has ended. The nausea and vomiting is now breaking through the medicine. I guess I will be going home early :(. Nothing good to say so I will say nothing else. Sad.

My new best friend! I drink this at night and it helps with the reflux.