Much Better!

Yesterday the new home health agency started working with me at the house. The difference was huge and was a big relief. I cannot emphasize enough the importance of good care when you are dealing with HG in pregnancy. The compassion and proactive treatment of my physician has made such a difference in this pregnancy. Even though I still feel horrible most of the time, I have not reached the critical stage like I did in my last pregnancy. Have a doctor who is willing to take time to keep working with me and working through the issues associated with HG means that I am not in such a huge deterioration and have spent way less time in the hospital.

The new home health agency was wonderful. Where the first company was more concerned about what they would not do and what worked best for the, this agency wants to do what is best for the patient. They took extensive time filling out my history and checking my health. When they found out I had been having some issues, the picked up the phone right there and contacted my doctor. Where the last company would have said I should call, they picked up the phone and called her themselves. In addition to the time and care they took finding out my situation, the offered many helpful alternatives should I need the services. For instance, they have offered to do blood draws and take them to the lab rather than my having to make a special trip to the doctor to have them done. They listed several things they can do as long as they have doctor orders. They were more than willing to do things to make my life easier and were most concerned about what was going to be best for my health. Huge difference, they are definitely patient focused!

Currently I am having trouble sleeping at night, this is not uncommon with my pregnancies. First I am usually up sick most of the night and I am prone to insomnia with my thyroid issues. So I am really exhausted most of the time. I am trying to find ways to resolve the insomnia but if it continues I suppose I will have to talk with the doctor about the issue and see if there is some remedy. I seem to have good days and bad days, days where I am sicker than others and am able to keep less down. I try to balance those days by making sure that I eat good foods the days that I can keep more down. I am currently reading through lists of "pregnancy super foods." I will post a good list once I have them down. However, I do always tell people that you are the only one who can decide what you can and cannot eat. Knowing something is good for you will not over rule the gag reflex if you are not interested in eating that particular food.

I am no in my 17th week. Around 20 weeks is when I see a marked difference in the sickness. Usually around that point things start to taper off and I start to hold more down. I am hoping that this is going to be the same trend with this pregnancy. I HOPE!

IV Day

The home health nurse was here for over three hours today. For some reason the pharmacy didn't want to give me a pump so I had a flow control line instead. That took forever to run a liter of fluid in so the nurse finally called the pharmacy and requested a pump. She did the flushes and heparin in the lines and then changed out the dressing. The dressing is different than the one used in the hospital, but it is all the same to me. The constant use of tapes has caused skin irritation and bruising like you would not believe. I have an ugly bruise where they placed the line and several where they tried and failed to place lines in before they got me hydrated enough for my veins to hold up to the line placement. I look like someone has been beating me.

The mood in the house is tense. Trying to keep the house clean and presentable for a flow of strangers in and out is turning into a battle of immense proportions. I suppose I will just start cleaning it myself instead of asking for help. I think that will save a great deal of heart and head ache in the long run. As long as I do short bursts of activity and do not try to do it all in one sitting I won't wear out too much. The smells of cleaning and cleaning fluid are what kills me right now. I hate smells sometimes I just want to shove something up my nose to block it off.

Tomorrow is church day, my husband really wants me to go. He seems to be getting more frustrated with me for not going and doing this or that and I understand. I just wish he had more understanding that I do not feel well either. He keeps telling me that this person or that person would like to see me, I appreciate that but it just ends up feeling like judgment and makes me feel worse.

Tired and nauseated is about the sum of all my feelings right now. I guess frustration is anchored on there too. I wish there was less of all three and that I was one of those people who glowed through their entire pregnancy feeling fabulous gained the appropriate amount of weight and then had a perfect angel baby. Wouldn't that be nice?

Delivery Day

I got my delivery today from the pharmacy. I have bags of fluid, my own IV pole, and all the dressing changes. I love new stuff but just not that excited about this little delivery. I mean who dives excitedly into a box of saline flush for your PICC line. I find myself picturing things to do to the IV pole to dress it up and make it more present like to make it less depressing. Maybe I should put some ribbons or get some of the kids stickers. Maybe if I hang some plants from the bag hooks that will make it somewhat more attractive sitting over there in the corner.

The kids seem to be handling this well. I try to make it a joke so it is less intimidating. I told them my PICC line was a snake :p and that if the get to close it will bite them...okay so not intimidating but it does make them giggle. I sit on the couch covered up and run to the bathroom, but other than that I am grateful to be home. The idea of spending almost three months in the hospital is a nightmare. The nurses are wonderful and I loved the care I got on the floor but I missed my boys. I was a weeping wimp when I broke down and cried that last night. I just could not stop crying. Of course, I could just write it off as hormones.

Today I am grateful for being home, and that my children are not overwhelmed by all the medical equipment that is invading our home. I am happy to see my kids faces rather than having to stare at hospital walls all day. I am thankful that the baby from all signs is healthy and wiggling happily in my tummy unfazed by the difficult health situation I am going through right now. I am grateful to have only 166 days to go and looking forward to better days ahead.