The home health nurse was here for over three hours today. For some reason the pharmacy didn't want to give me a pump so I had a flow control line instead. That took forever to run a liter of fluid in so the nurse finally called the pharmacy and requested a pump. She did the flushes and heparin in the lines and then changed out the dressing. The dressing is different than the one used in the hospital, but it is all the same to me. The constant use of tapes has caused skin irritation and bruising like you would not believe. I have an ugly bruise where they placed the line and several where they tried and failed to place lines in before they got me hydrated enough for my veins to hold up to the line placement. I look like someone has been beating me.
The mood in the house is tense. Trying to keep the house clean and presentable for a flow of strangers in and out is turning into a battle of immense proportions. I suppose I will just start cleaning it myself instead of asking for help. I think that will save a great deal of heart and head ache in the long run. As long as I do short bursts of activity and do not try to do it all in one sitting I won't wear out too much. The smells of cleaning and cleaning fluid are what kills me right now. I hate smells sometimes I just want to shove something up my nose to block it off.
Tomorrow is church day, my husband really wants me to go. He seems to be getting more frustrated with me for not going and doing this or that and I understand. I just wish he had more understanding that I do not feel well either. He keeps telling me that this person or that person would like to see me, I appreciate that but it just ends up feeling like judgment and makes me feel worse.
Tired and nauseated is about the sum of all my feelings right now. I guess frustration is anchored on there too. I wish there was less of all three and that I was one of those people who glowed through their entire pregnancy feeling fabulous gained the appropriate amount of weight and then had a perfect angel baby. Wouldn't that be nice?
The mood in the house is tense. Trying to keep the house clean and presentable for a flow of strangers in and out is turning into a battle of immense proportions. I suppose I will just start cleaning it myself instead of asking for help. I think that will save a great deal of heart and head ache in the long run. As long as I do short bursts of activity and do not try to do it all in one sitting I won't wear out too much. The smells of cleaning and cleaning fluid are what kills me right now. I hate smells sometimes I just want to shove something up my nose to block it off.
Tomorrow is church day, my husband really wants me to go. He seems to be getting more frustrated with me for not going and doing this or that and I understand. I just wish he had more understanding that I do not feel well either. He keeps telling me that this person or that person would like to see me, I appreciate that but it just ends up feeling like judgment and makes me feel worse.
Tired and nauseated is about the sum of all my feelings right now. I guess frustration is anchored on there too. I wish there was less of all three and that I was one of those people who glowed through their entire pregnancy feeling fabulous gained the appropriate amount of weight and then had a perfect angel baby. Wouldn't that be nice?
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