Today has just been one of those nightmare kind of days.
The "progesterone" supplement is really starting to wear on me and the side effects are crazy. Insane mood swings, cramping in my legs, bathroom issues. Pregnancy hormones are insane on their own adding a supplement is like asking me to go postal. I am trying to keep my emotions in check and under control but find myself snapping more often and I hate myself later. I have snapped at my children and my husband and I despise that kind of behavior for myself and it is one thing I try never to do and always to try and keep my answers more or less rational.
I had my first "sick" day today. Just nauseated and ill most of the day. I really really hate being sick. Then there is the fact that we are staying with my parents. My mother does not like or allow for sickness in any form. When I told her I didn't want to go and sit in a restaurant tonight she was very unhappy. She was unhappy once again when I said that I did not want to go on a walk. I have walked the last two days as we visited two touristy spots and that on top of vomiting makes for an unpleasant combination. She gave me the standard response you get from most people, "if you get up and move around you will feel better." Seriously, no I won't the more exhausted I am the worse I feel. Exhaustion and nausea do NOT do either any favors.
My husband is leaving us here for five weeks and going back to work. I hate to think of him leaving, he is my support and understands when I am not feeling well. He also gives me a childcare break when he is home from work. The kids are upset he is leaving and are crying cause they will miss him, which is stressful and sad trying to get them to settle down and just enjoy our visit.
Now I am trying to decide if I should shorten my trip by at least three weeks and head home. I do not want to be here and away from my physician should something happen. I already feel out of control on my hormones and the down time I have thanks to my husband gives me an opportunity to regroup. I will be the 24/7 parent for the next five weeks. I am also working to finish my thesis proposal and my last class for my Masters degree. Will I ever be able to do this while being the 24/7 parent and dealing with the nausea and vomiting?
I have no idea, I am sure everything will be fine. Not really sure but kind of sure.
Where am I today...
I am 8 weeks and 4 days pregnant...
I am on hormones that are making me into a crazy person...
I had my first sick day and hated it...
My husband is going back home for five weeks and I am worried about caring for the kids...
I am working on my thesis and worried I will not be able to everything in on time...
I am exhausted all the time!
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